TAKE CARE OF THE VEHICLE
You live in your most important vehicle, your body, every single day. When it is not running smoothly, you may react negatively. If you are tired and exhausted, hungry, overworked, stressed, anxious, or in pain, you likely have a shorter fuse, poor perspective and an attitude that no one around you deserves; especially your spouse. Read the rest of this entry »
BOILING PASSION
It takes more muscles to frown than it does to smile. Husbands and wives need to know how to break the frown habit and choose the easy path – smiling – instead of growling or criticizing one another. Of course, smiles that are on the sneer order or ones that move the lips in an upward curve while the eyes remain cold and/or antagonistic aren’t smiles, at all. They are veiled hostility.
Some people are so negative, they are ready to punch their spouses if they come within two feet of them – emotionally or even physically. Such behavior affects the entire family. One boy told me that he and his siblings didn’t dare awaken their mother by getting close. If it was time for her to get up to get ready to go to work and she still was sleeping, they would stand at the door and call to her softly. As soon as she stirred, they’d run. Maybe it was because of poor health on her part and possibly heavy stress, but there is no excuse for anyone to take it out on their loved ones.
Let’s play around with an analogy here. Fresh fruit is delicious and refreshing in most people’s opinion. Perhaps, when the harvest is ripe, you’ve experienced placing it in a pot and bringing it to a boil. As it boils it is fascinating to watch. However, if not watched carefully, it can burn. Very disappointing. It also is dangerous if it splashes on you. That hurts. I still have a scar on my shin from that very thing when I was a child.
Now let’s compare boiling fruit to your marriage relationship. Read the rest of this entry »
If You Don’t Know, I’m Not Telling
It was classic; and I witnessed it. Here’s what happened.
He looked at her and said, “I’m really sorry, can you just tell me what I did wrong?”
She said, “If you don’t know, then I am not telling you.”
He said, “No really. I really don’t know. If you’ll just tell me, I won’t do it again.”
Silence.
She looked at me then and said, “I’m telling you, he already knows.”
When I looked over at him, he was staring at her, with that deer in the headlights look. Then he looked at me, looked at her, then looked at me. Carefully he cleared his throat and said, “Ummmmm, what am I supposed to say now?” Read the rest of this entry »
WORLD SERIES
Baseball is a favorite with me, even though I seldom have the time to watch it. 2010 was different. I took time…at least for the World Series. The San Francisco Giants and the Texas Rangers were battling it out. At this point, they had played only two games, so what I had witnessed at that time was not the end of the story; but so far it had been a head shaker. That’s because in Game One, the Giants had dominated until they won by four runs.
Pitiful is the only word to describe Game Two. We started viewing it in the 7th inning. That’s when the Rangers pitched 13 balls – 11 by one pitcher alone. He walked in two runs. To make it worse, the game was a shut out. The Rangers were one very dejected bunch of men when the Giants walked off the field with a 9 to 0 victory.
In baseball, however, as in any sport, fortune can make a 100 degree turn very suddenly. The one who is limping in last may surprise everyone and come in first. That’s always thrilling to see. Read the rest of this entry »
Caution to Strong Women – and Their Men
Hollywood is adept at capturing the essence of the strong woman who can conquer the world, entice men, make her husband glad he is a man because of her and live happily ever after. Sorry, but that’s not the way it plays out – at least, usually. The woman who leads, controls and outdoes her husband very often leaves him in the turbulence of her wake, to flounder and wonder how and why he got there. Read the rest of this entry »
Controlling and Possessive
At the question/answer period during one of our marriage seminars, one anonymous note handed to us was this:
My husband won’t let me have any outside activities. I feel smothered.
He won’t let her? That sounds odd in today’s climate of relationships. And yet it isn’t as unusual as you might think. There are men who control their women to the point of emotional or physical abuse. Read the rest of this entry »
Take Care of the Vehicle & Save Your Marriage
You live in your most important vehicle, your body, every moment of every day. When it is not running smoothly, you react negatively. If you are tired and exhausted, hungry, overworked, stressed, anxious, or in pain, you have a shorter fuse, poor perspective and an attitude that no one around you deserves; especially your spouse. Read the rest of this entry »
Forgetfulness – Sometimes It’s a Good Thing
Warning! This may irritate you at first and even sound complicated, but I promise you, if you will stay with me, you’re going to learn to do something that will help repair your marriage and your life. Read the rest of this entry »
Sneak Attack for a Hurting Marriage
If you’re up to an eye opening few moments that can begin the process of saving your marriage or making it a whole lot better, Read the rest of this entry »
What Made Your Spouse Fall In Love With You?
You may have been married two years ago or 50. It doesn’t matter. Think back to when you first met your spouse, when he or she fell in love with you, and when you both said, “I do.”
What was it about you that was so attractive? What was it about you that was so fascinating? If you don’t know, ask. Don’t make it a big deal; don’t push and probe for deeper meanings; just ask and write the answers down.
Yes, we always read that love needs to mature; that it needs to focus on more important things as the years go by. However, if you are struggling with your marriage, if it’s not what you had always hoped it would be, and you are thinking of giving up – then start doing what is necessary to save your marriage. Start by remembering what it was that stirred your spouse to love you in the beginning.
Got those things written down? (I hate it when people tell me to write things down, but I have a reason, so please humor me.) Did he like you because of your slender figure? Did she love all the romantic things you did for her – cards, flowers and creative dates? Did he love the way you cooked? Did she fall for the way you made her laugh?
So, how do you stack up now? Not so good? All right then, here’s the drill. Read the rest of this entry »
